I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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