There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
