Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize