Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
We talked him into tasing himself.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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