i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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