hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize