belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
