He kissed a someone with a penis
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
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Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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