his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
