can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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