Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
