I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
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