On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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