i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize