# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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