Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Randomize
