Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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