i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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