Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize