Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
