i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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