Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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