I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Sponge bath it is.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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