I think my vagina is haunted
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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