Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
