he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize