Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
