did you get engaged???
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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