I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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