with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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