Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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