I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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