That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
