Are we in a gay sports bar?
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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