is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
