i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
