is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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