I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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