I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
