Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers