I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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