when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Randomize
