checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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