Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
