my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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