his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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