My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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