how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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