you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Randomize
