She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
