he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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